|
|
Post by meskie on Nov 1, 2021 7:49:40 GMT -6
|
|
|
|
Post by Beerwiser on Nov 1, 2021 23:19:21 GMT -6
|
|
|
|
Post by northernfarmer on Nov 4, 2021 19:35:37 GMT -6
|
|
|
|
Post by meskie on Nov 4, 2021 19:40:04 GMT -6
|
|
|
|
Post by Beerwiser on Nov 5, 2021 22:49:00 GMT -6
[ Questions to ponder]
I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes.
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
HOW DID THE MAN WHO MADE THE FIRST CLOCK, KNOW WHAT TIME IT WAS?
|
|
CTS2
Junior Member
Posts: 70
Likes: 27
|
Post by CTS2 on Nov 6, 2021 3:36:02 GMT -6
|
|
|
|
Post by northernfarmer on Nov 6, 2021 9:34:51 GMT -6
Yes you did catch them on that joke, of course there are battery powered boosters to give a quick shot which is really not much different then plunking down a large charged battery and hooking it up. But yes, for smaller devices a battery operated battery charger is a real thing these days.
|
|
|
|
Post by meskie on Nov 10, 2021 20:42:28 GMT -6
|
|
|
|
Post by meskie on Nov 10, 2021 20:42:59 GMT -6
|
|
|
|
Post by northernfarmer on Nov 12, 2021 20:59:22 GMT -6
The wife and I were out for a walk last night and we walked past an expensive restaurant. My wife said "MMMmmmm, that smells amazing!" I thought, what the hell, I could treat her. So we walked past again.
|
|
|
|
Post by northernfarmer on Nov 15, 2021 17:04:06 GMT -6
A man got his car stuck during a drive in the country and he needed help getting it out. So he walked until he found a farm and asked the farmer for help. The farmer agrees to help the guy out. So he takes a horse out of the stable and leads him to the car. The farmer then ties a harness around the horse and the other end to the car.
The farmer yells, "Pull, Sandy!" The horse just stands there.
The farmer yells, "Come on now, pull Twister!" The horse once again just stands there.
Finally, the farmer yells, "Ok dangit, PULL RANGER! You're just standing there!" The horse springs forward and with all the strength he has and pulls the car out of the ditch and onto the roadside.
The man thanks the farmer many times, but before leaving asks the farmer why he yelled out names of horses that weren't there.
The farmer replies, "Oh, you see Ranger there is completely blind and a lazy horse. He wasn't going to pull if he thought he was the only one trying."
|
|
|
|
Post by northernfarmer on Nov 16, 2021 9:55:42 GMT -6
.
|
|
|
|
Post by northernfarmer on Nov 17, 2021 17:55:15 GMT -6
As the storm raged, the captain realized his ship was sinking fast. He called out, "Anyone here know how to pray?"
One man stepped forward. "Aye, Captain, I know how to pray."
"Good," said the captain, "you pray while the rest of us put on our life jackets...we're one short."
|
|
|
|
Post by northernfarmer on Nov 18, 2021 18:28:09 GMT -6
A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"
In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something. Our bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a six foot tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is six foot two, weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is six foot five, pushing 300, and he's a wrestler. Each one of us is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
|
|
|
|
Post by OptimallyDismal on Nov 19, 2021 9:02:40 GMT -6
A bear and a rabbit are taking a dump in the woods
Bear says to the rabbit: do you have any problems with poop sticking to your fur?
Rabbit, with a superior air, replies, no.
So the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit.
|
|
